I’d left myself a challenge with the choices I made in some long flashback scenes. While the main storyline of Crimson Wraith takes place in 2019 (before I knew what 2020 would be like), it’s intercut with flashbacks going back almost a century that build context for current events.
In Chapter 2, when I returned to 1922 and 1930, I wanted the style of the prose to feel a little more old-fashioned, a little more verbose -- which is saying something considering my default writing style. So, I found myself slogging through tangles of exposition that slowed down my editing, but I feel like I managed to inch the narration closer to Hammet, farther from Fitzgerald.
In comparison, the 2019 pages edited very smoothly and I managed to save some imagery that I really like:
On her bus ride home, Gracie stared out the window as the sunset splashed fire across gleaming skyscrapers that belched out swarms of crisply dressed professionals to be hassled by street vendors pushing the evening paper.
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